My Uncle Charlie Is a Cynical Man
And His Wifes a Touch Skeptical, Too.
They've Got One of Those Stickers
In the Back of Their Van; It Says:
We've Seen the Prices At the Zoo.
Well Today I Knocked Upon Their Door
And Said That I Was Passing,
And Charlie Launched a Scathing Attack.
When I Asked Him What I'd Done, He Said
"You Stupid Bastard! We Live in a Cul-de-sac!"

Went to Darlene's Party; It Was Fancy Dress.
I Just Stuck An Apple in My Face.
I Saw a Chap Who Obviously Was Out to Impress,
Reckoned He'd Beat Gagarin Into Space.
He Said "Hi There {? Souls! ?}
Like I'm Sorry I'm Late!
But I Was Getting Done Up
As a Mobile Thrash Acetate!"
Me, I Got Bored
So I Went Home,
Got Into Bed,
And Came to the Conclusion...

There Is Nothing Better in Life
Than Writing On the Sole of Your Slipper With a Birol
There Is Nothing Better in Life
Than Writing On the Sole of Your Slipper With a Birol
There Is Nothing Better in Life
Than Writing On the Sole of Your Slipper With a Birol
There Is Nothing Better in Life
Than Writing On the Sole of Your Slipper With a Birol
On a Saturday Night Instead of Going to a Pub.